Day 2

Last night, I asked Xavier what he planned to accomplish in the morning. He responded with "Shower & Unshower." Homeschooling is going well. We are in the middle of creating our own language. It is a thing that happens when people spend too much time together.

12:38pm - Xavier emerged from his bedroom for breakfast. He started to make pancakes. They were not cooperating with him. The first few he burned, the next one stuck to the pan. First freakout of the quarantine.

01:07pm - I offered to finish making the pancakes. He took them in his room.

04:33pm - I go to check on him. He was asleep, the meltdown was a good one. We walk the garbage to the road and check the mail together. This counts as workout, check mail, go outside, chore and family time. Because today is rough. He reads his Bible verse of the day. All that is left is hygiene. He goes back to his bedroom.


The TRUTH is today is hard. Reality is starting to sink in. I have been living this life of doing online school, saying yes to daytime activities and being fully present to being a mom most nights. This has been how my life has been since September. It's hard to get used to X being here, ALL THE TIME. The stress came out over pancakes, so I think it's hard for him to get used to being here too, with just me. Even if he thinks he'd rather be homeschooled.

I was really overwhelmed this morning between the group chats and everyone in the world who is also adjusting to these changes. Social distancing feels the same for my physically, but there's a part of this that is informational/emotional overload. It's not distance, not for an introvert, Enneagram 5/6. I talked to a few people to help me prioritize my life. I need a filter to process these requests.

I'm a mom, sober support, student and friend in that order. It helps me to know what gets my yes in any moment to have a list like this. I cried today a little, and then I went & started a mini-podcast with my friend. A trial-run of sorts. It makes little sense & so much sense. This is what the Upside-Down feels like to me. So right, so weird.

Unshower means to dry off with a towel. Not to get dirty, which was my first thought.

Day 1

Today is day 1, according to Xavier. Monday didn't count because it was already supposed to be a day off, so it was still a "free" day. Whatever, man. On Sunday night, we got the news that all schools in Erie County were going to be closed until 4/20. (Do you think 4/20 will always have a marijuana joke in our minds, or do you think that will change when it is legal everywhere?) Anyways...On Sunday, X & I created a list. He promised that if he had any schoolwork, he would get it all done early. The time crunch of trying to do everything on 4/19 might kill me otherwise.

Monday, DAY ONE
12:33pm - Xavier is awake. Find out he stayed up until 6am watching Netflix.

01:00pm - Xavier checks off the first thing on his list, hygiene. This looks promising. He then makes himself breakfast & goes into his room.

04:00pm - I realize he never came back out. He's watching Netflix. I go remind him of The List. He comes out, does a workout, takes a call from his dad, gets dinner.... & goes back into his room to eat & probably watch more Netflix.

07:00pm - I remind him of The List. He checks the mail. He starts a load of laundry & goes back in his room. (Netflix, obviously).

08:30pm - I tell him to move his clothes to the dryer & to check The List. We color with my new markers as family time and he read two sentences aloud.

"Homeschool" is done. List is complete. Eight hours. Eight. We are adjusting. Pray for us.

He just came out for a snack, asked for something we definitely don't have in stock & went back to his room. I'm just going to remember that the list got done. The execution wasn't pretty, but it is finished. For today.